Legacy
They say in the
rooms
that hurt
(adjective) people,
hurt (verb) people.
In the case of my
mother,
and her mother
before her,
nothing could be
more true.
You see,
my mother was never
able to figure out
how to not hate me-
even though,
in her best moments
I think she really
wanted to.
But how does one
who lives in a
constant
state of lost and
confused,
ever find a pathway
to kindness?
A wise, 84 year-old
American JewBu once
said:
“When we are
confused,
we forget to be
kind.
When we are not
confused,
we remember to be
kind.”
I truly hope to
remember.
But intergenerational
family
patterns of
hardwired hurt
can make DNA
disassembly
feel next to
impossible at times.
And oddly, it is
even seen
by some local insiders
as disloyal to fathom
breaking
a toxic legacy
that has left so many casualties
in a state of
chronic heartbreak.
But then, remarkably,
I find myself
I find myself
gazing down into the
round,
blue eyes of my own
6 year-old daughter
as she engineers her
newest invention
out of duct tape and
recycled paper towel rolls,
and I know for
absolute certain,
the spell has
finally been broken.
-Me
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