Poetry 164: A Prayer for Emptiness

A Prayer for Emptiness

(photo by me from New England woods)

Each step I take
allows another layer
of protection to
fall away.

And the more I lose,
carves a deeper, more
luxurious space inside.

(Maybe, one day,
the whole world can 
drop in.)

Adversity builds character.
So they say.
But does it, 
really?

I’ve seen character harden
into habit that 
becomes impenetrable-
for life.

Perhaps though, with intention,
adversity can actually deconstruct
character instead.

Like the sharp edges
of sea glass smoothed
out after decades in an
unsympathetic ocean,
all of our unhelpful thoughts
patterns and behaviors 
that once kept us in 
an invisible prison,
might disintegrate into
mere specks of sand;
leaving a majestic internal canyon 
just large enough to 
feel the whole entire thing-
with a smile.

My dear Mother, 
please empty me out entirely.
I want to taste the freedom & joy
of a free-wheeling generosity and compassion
that comes when I no longer
need to maintain
that compelling story of Me.

Please, 
let Me go.

Let me fly.

-Me

Poetry 163: Being Human

Being Human

Do you know what it’s like

to be unable to breathe

when that which is most

precious is lost forever?

Yes, I do.

Do you know what it’s like

to wake up in the middle

of the night completely

terrified that everything is

just about to fall to pieces?

Oh yes.

Do you know what it’s like

to mourn something that

has never actually been,

and is unlikely to ever be?

Unfortunately, yes.

How about what it’s like

to just want one, brief moment

of sanity to just catch your breath

before the next move?

Absolutely.

So then, let me ask you something.

Okay.

Who are you?

Human.

-Me

Poetry 162: Flowing Seamlessly

Flowing Seamlessly

The dusty gray clouds

parted for the

briefest of moments today-

just enough time for a slim

ray of sunlight to slip

right through.

Through my new large

office window, right

above the entrance of

a hospital, where families

rush inside to get the most terrible

news of their most beloved.

Beloved father, mother,

partner, child,

grandparent, & best friend.

All that invisible glue and

intangible love that organizes

our ridiculously messy lives.

Lives surrounded by tigers

who stand on the edges of

the cliff where we hang off

the side, all the while

eating a luscious

strawberry.

Lives built upon fragility, vulnerability,

uncertainty, and of course,

death.

Death of this moment,

and then the next.

Flowing seamlessly, beauty

upon terror, terror upon

beauty. Beginning to end,

end to beginning.

Look, the sunlight is

camouflaged once more.

Once more.

-Me

Poetry 161: Gratitude in This Very Moment

I don’t speak of the gift, because not for everything that’s given to you can you really be grateful. You can’t be grateful for war in a given situation, or violence, or sickness, things like that.

So the key, when people ask, “Can you be grateful for everything?” — no, not for everything, but in every moment.

Brother David Steindl-Rast, 2015

Gratitude in This Very Moment

The shadowy beauty of dawn and dusk

This extra hot cup of coffee in my right hand

The way my son still holds a hug longer that I think he will

Gentle kisses from my not-quite 2 year-old kitty who still gets into all kinds of mischief

The ability to afford takeout on a Friday night

Anything by Henri Nouwen

Super soft blankets tucked in tight under my chin at bedtime

Wild turkeys causing traffic during the morning commute

Hurt transforming into wisdom

The way technology still allows me to see your sweet face

Caring for my own body in an extended rag doll until the release comes

This quiet moment right here

-Me

P.S. Okay, now it is your turn. What are you grateful for in this very moment right here? A tip, don't force it. Just open, and see what is already there.