I’m looking for a teacher
who understands—and even appreciates—
a well-timed swear
like shit or fuck
in a moment of frustration.
Someone who gets it
when I say:
Getting out of
bed this morning
felt absolutely
impossible.
I need a teacher
who recognizes
what an accomplishment
it is to not only get
the dirty laundry of
4 family members
clean AND dried, but
also actually
put away.
(I mean, trophies should
be given for that, right?)
And I need someone
who has suffered
such a great wound
(or two or three)
that they never really quite
recovered.
I want a teacher who will say
it to me straight, if necessary,
like a nail hammered
right between the eyes:
Oh yeah,
life is fucking
hard sometimes,
and,
I love you.
Someone who can
sit in silence for hours if need be-
because that
is how long it
takes me to break down
my layers of armor,
bullshit and
defense mechanisms
in order to squeeze
out one single tear.
I need a teacher
who loves god
as much as I do,
and would spend hours
gazing at the way the morning
light plays on the
the dew of an indiscriminate
blade of grass at dawn,
just because.
And a teacher who’s sense
of god is
so expansive
that I would
never feel a need to make
myself smaller than
I am in order to fit
into her loving arms.
Yes, this is
the spiritual teacher
that I am
looking for.
If you know someone
who fits this description,
please give them
my number.
-Me
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